| tomatoes |
[08 Aug 2009|01:06am] |
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orientation is over, i think i had a nice time and met some nice people. the only thing which frustrates me is why i got allocated a different timetable from the rest of 2009B. i thought the whole idea of having an alum group is so that we can work together and stuff so why is my timetable different. i want that timetable and i want to take btc1 with leemin to school! awesome way to get to school. well now i could only pray that the appeal falls through.
monday was the inauguration ceremony which was quite fun to attend, flag day on tue wasnt so good though. it was pretty boring and tiring to ask for donations :( wed was talks and games and finished with thu's masquerade party since i didnt go for sentosa. im so glad i went for o week and got to know the girls from fuzzylumpkins. hee.
i have been watching paris hilton's my new bff. i am surprised by how so many girls (and boys alike) are so starstruck and 'inspired' by her. they talk about how they see her as a role model in every aspect of their lives and how they want to emulate the things she does and fight each other just to be her bff. and theres a season two, so what happened to bff season one?? and the backstabbing, where do i even began with the backstabbing. there is this supposedly good christian girl from texas on the show, and they all think shes a saint cos shes a virgin and goes to church three times a week. she doesnt seem into their lifestyle so what does she stnd to gain from participating in it?
i have no class on tue, its nice to have first class of the sem cancelled.
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| of purple nails |
[02 Aug 2009|10:36pm] |
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its orientation tomorrow and im kind of looking forward to going back to school, making new friends and start working up my brain. i think the next four (hopefully) years are going to be fun yet paramount then i am off to battle dragons in the coporate world. although accountancy isn't exactly what i have always set up to achieve, i have to try and like it or else school would be so miserable. but then again, i hardly get what i wanted, maybe god thinks what i want is never the best plan for me.
had tuao team practice this afternoon after church, i think its great how our schedule is going to work out by everybody scarificing their commitments once. i'm in charge of the vbs team this trip together with alistair. i think cain and abel would make a good lesson. singing today was really efficient (: there was this part when irvin muted geraldine and i just burst out in laughter midway cos i realised eunice and i were the only ones singing. haha.
p and i wore the exact same outfit today. dark blue polo with the white (for him) and silver(for me) pony together with white pants/skirt! its quite a sight and makes i think its one of those things i will always remember and will make me smile. if only he told me what i shld have worn yesterday this wouldn't have happened!
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| toodles |
[17 May 2009|01:19am] |
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it means so much to her. she only wishes she means the same to it.
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| podiatry surgery |
[27 Apr 2009|08:42pm] |
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everytime my mom has a screaming fit at me, i just want to bore through my eardrums with screwdrivers. really. i pulled the remainder of my toenail out yesterday evening and attempted to perform minor podiatry-esque surgery on my toe by cutting out the harden part of my nail-less toe with a penknife. the consequence was needless to say a bloodbath. it hurt abit. but really, if i didnt do that the nail that grows back would just grow over the harden part and never be attached to my flesh.
i'd appreciate another day in the week i think. i want to learn driving but money is hard-earned and i feel such a heartache shelling it out on lessons so i guess i will put it off for now. you know, i have alwaye been envious of kids whose parents drive them to school. haha it is just alot harder to drag yourself out of bed every morning at the same time when the thought of public transport creeps in.
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| a plastic case |
[18 Apr 2009|10:32pm] |
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i feel so superficial, like i behave a certain way, talk a certain way and talk about certain things only so that they would accept me. so that they would like me. yet only when i am not in the presence oh him, i could be myself, and worse of it all, i don't even think this shell i have enacted is considered attractive. its all so stupid because i consciously tell myself not to be like that but subconscious it happens, God help me. sighh.
bloc party- my latest music obsession. listen to hunting for witches and this modern love. nice.
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| just a random thought |
[16 Apr 2009|12:42am] |
 considering the fact that probably no one who knows that guy knows this blog, i have taken the liberties to blog it. it is such a beautiful, inspiring shot depsite the fact that it has been digitally tempered with. i seriously think its an awesome photo (no i am not being biased). hmm i have nothing much to journal about so i guess this is it. |
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| no i am not too crazy too serve the government! |
[14 Apr 2009|11:19pm] |
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haha okay a psychometric test is not all about evaluting your sanity but a test on spatial and numerical reasoning and english/verbal comprehension. there was also 170 questions on personality which were quite a breeze to do although everything lasted for three and the half hours. it wouldn't have been so torturous if the questions weren't THAT hard. really, its not that i am bad at math or anything but it would have actually been do-able if they gave us more than the measly thirty minutes to complete the thirty three mind boggling sums. i did twenty four and olivia did twenty. haha but i guess the sane part of it all is that everyone couldn't complete. maybe thats the point, like if you COULD complete it you would really have been too crazy to serve the governement. okay not funny.
i just did my first summation question in five months while helping p with his math homework over msn. wahh i took sooo long to get the correct answer okay. math was mundane when i was still in school but now that math is no longer mandatory for people like me, we just treasure every opportunity we have to do it. summation use to be the easy one. its INTEGRATION that is the bane of my existanceee! haha how could i every forget the fact that i never knew integration all they way until prelims (:
its a looong day for me tmr, sibi in the morning, tuition in the afternoon and clinic at night, i think i will miss home :( like seriously.
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| theres nothing wrong with me i hope |
[11 Apr 2009|11:33pm] |
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i met ethan for dinner at mos burger today after sibi so he could pass me my birthday present. it was a cd he made, a collection of rock songs which he thinks are nice (i like rock). its really nice of you ethan, haha its sort of edward-ish and thanks for remembering i like rock (: then tomorrow elaine is passing me bryan and her present. so now its just olivia, nikhil and gareth.
i feel so rejected. like something is fundamentally wrong with my character. and i always ruin things, ruin things that have already gotten better. now i will have to start from scratch again. i keep on telling myself that these things don't matter, not in the long run at least, not in five years time but yet at the same time i can't stop trying to make things right. i don't not want to leave it in god's hands, i do, but perhaps i don't even know what leaving it in god's hands entails me to do. it was such a bad combination. two of the things that affect me the most happening at the same time, i was bound to slip. why can't both parties understand. i feel so foolish right now, like i'm going to crumble into a million little pieces.prayer helped to put me back together abit. this is so ridiculous and so unlike me. i'm supposed to be swift and efficient with dealing everything, not feeling helpless. riddikulus.
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| evil plans and stuff |
[10 Apr 2009|11:08pm] |
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evil plans and stuff: thats what the cover of my new notebook says. i wanted to take a picture of it and post it here but laziness overwhelms me haha. i feel sort of akward right now mostly beause im not used to being rejected or unfancied. and i know its ridiculous to feel that way right. my current favourite movie right now is twilight. okay i bet you are going "would have guessed so right now" but twilight makes me smile with the whole glory of first love thing. vampire falls in love with a human girl and battles to restratn his animalistic urges and succeeds. in addition he goes to great lengths to give her the best. yes i know its fiction.
i hvnt watched a movie in a loooong time. like the last movie i watched was slumdog millionaire! well right now i really want to watch shopaholic, i read the book like two years ago (when i borrowed it from a boy haha) and if i recall correctly it was quite funny. yay ethan is passing me my present (something he drew) after his taking photo thing at botanic gardens haha.
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| teeheehee |
[08 Apr 2009|10:02pm] |
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26 march 2009;
guy on the phone: hey. may i speak to cheryl please
me: yes speaking. may i know whos that?
guy on the phone; i'm calling from smu school of law to tell you that you have been shortlisted for the law interview
me: are you playing a birthday joke on me?
guy on the phone: no but if its your birthday, happy birthday
so today i went for the interview that i possibly only got because of God's grace and i think it went alright so thank God mans. it was quite an enjoyable interview actually although it felt like a "come up with a response IMMEDIATELY after you are told something" conversation along with the fifteen minute essay. heh exciting huh. newspaper mugging prove to be quite effective. but but all the questions i have prepared under advice all didnt come out so it was quite frustrating because they were supposed to come out! i was in the same interview group with two rafflesians (can you actually believe how unfortunate that is). okay i have to admit that i wasn't assigned to it, we just happened to be walking along with no clue who each other were until we took our seats to wait for our turn. i was quite intimidated at first but i think we were all pretty on par and not-bad upon reading those online forums after. now i will just be praying very hard that its god's grace. went to watch the vj-rj soccer match at vj on mondat after sibi with olivia who could come with me during the last minute because her tutee cancelled tuition(: or else i would have to sit on the vj side with basil (i'm supporting rj duh). it was quite an exciting match although they drew 1-1. loads of screaming, close moments and bemusing strategies :P i am going to the clinic tomorrow and if i remember correctly, i still have four birthday presents due. teeheehee.
updated on 9 april: i suddenly remembered that i have five presents due cos people remind me but then i got one today so its still four hahaha.
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| take the newspaper away! |
[05 Apr 2009|11:09pm] |
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my law interview is on wednesday and i am trying to pray and prepare myself as best as i can by reading (and trying to remember) all the current affairs articles in the papers. boy there are MANY. from what i have gathered, smu interviews could be scary if your results aren't perfect and you have to fight to answer, fight to stand out, fight to get noticed and still appear calm, composed and intelligent. haha. spoke to uncle yong kwang today about law and lawyers and he gave me some advice so that was nice. according to olivia i always pronounce and sometimes even type "as" as "has". never knew that haha.
went with olivia to vivo after the tuao briefing to get our passport photos take for our portfolios. mine are quite nice! except for the fact that one of my eyes look bigger than the other cos the eyelid fold is deeper. no i wasn't born like that, it just happened out of the blue one day and at first i thought it was because i had been crying so much. haha it sounds really superficial but it has always troubled me! it makes me feel so imperfect and lopsided.
i only found out yesterday that the tuao trip costs five hundred dollars which in my opinion really is alot. i'm not really complaining or rescinding going on the trip but i just feel that its quite expensive considering i have to pay for church camp and the trip by myself. well money doesn't just drop from the sky right. its a three weeks trip (like batam) but with no medical mission at the end and we are taking a domestic flight so theres no eleven or maybe more hours bussrides. i remembered being in the bus from eight in the morning till eight at night during the 2007 return journey.
this week is going to be an exciting one for me so i am kind of looking forward to it. heh i think if i were still a student i'd look forward to good friday quite a fair bit. a question i have for someone has been bugging me but it is quite inadequate for me to ask so i am trying to restrain my tongue. argh i have alot of things to say actually.
ta.
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| fossils |
[22 Mar 2009|11:01pm] |
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haha fossils cos unearthing my centuries old blog is parallel to archaelogy. i think. i have alot of these moments, where i talk about how i'm going to start blogging again but it never really happens (no! this doesn't happen with all my endeavours), i hope this week will be a good week since its my birthday week. i don't think i've had an all encompassing good week in a very long time. i will be working on my birthday because i want to. i enjoy being at the clinic although it is no hospital and i do many other non-med things too. i think another reason why i want to work on my birthday is because i feel like birthdays should be special and happy and based on last year's, it wasn't so i rather not do anything than let it be foiled, although there is just one thing i'd like to do.
i finally completed all my local uni and scholarship applications and sent in all the documents that are required so that is definitely a burden off my back. so many of those applications had a bunch of very weird mind-twisting essays to write and it so numbing after awhile. i think i'm in quite a scary position now, like my grades aren't really good enough for the competitive courses that i want to do but everything else below those shouldn't be a problem. its hard to pray frequently about applications cos of my graedes. i mean we hear about ppl who got aabb yet got into med/law although the nus thingy says otherwise and im hoping that god-willing, i'd be one of them yet at the same time i want to say "god put me where you see me best".
i'm upset with someone, i just wish she'd be less hypocritical and pause to look at her own actions before judging or condemming mine. i want to tell her how i feel about the things she say but i'm afraid that it would make her sad so i've been refraining from doing so. i've been online for so long but i slept till nine just now so i'm not up to sleeping yet. maybe i will go off and read like charmaine. hmm.
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| i heart starbucks <3 |
[19 Jul 2008|03:53pm] |
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it has been a looong time since i last blogged, somewhat it makes me wonder why i even do. telling people what i have been doing, what i am thinking and more often then not they are just random ramblings, it is not like my blog is becoming one of those reflecting aboout human emotions and behaviour or meaningful poliblogs threatening replace mainstream journalism. everytime i ramble incoherently about what is going on in my mind, it feels like i have nothing to say because all i have to say is either too shallow or personal to be aired in public.
i always though that i am a strong girl, no regrets regarding my actions or decisions whatsoever but it seems like now all the wrong decisions are creeping back to haunt me. i do not know how my thoughts convey them across to anyone and i think right now i am afraid of so many things. i just finished writing a gp essay and now i am sitting at startbucks, writing this, watching people and watching the world go by. I wonder what those people's lifes are like, watch friends laughing together, familes cuddling thier kid and wondered how long so many of those young couples are going to last. i wonder what it is that i really want.
i like going to school nowadays, school keeps me busy and gives me less times to think about things.
and now i don't know what else to say anymore.
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| sicky |
[02 Jul 2008|10:18pm] |
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its finally over. now there is just the hard work for the real thing.
cheryl is sick and that warrants no blogging cos blogging requires thinking.
love loads.
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| sing along |
[29 Jun 2008|04:28pm] |
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i feel washed with this unexplainable sense of boredom. i don't think i am supposed to feel this way because
1) i am left with two papers and two days of exams to study for
2) i just went shopping and bought two incredible pairs of shoes
3) i am sleepy
i tossed and turned in bed for the longest time yesterday night. usually when i eventually do go to bed, i am usually so tired that i fall alssep within minutes of my head touching the pillow. but oh no, not yesterday. you know how it is a cycle? like if you can't sleep you will think and the more you won't be able to sleep? well i fell asleep eventually of course but when i woke up this morning i was still thinking about the same silly thing although i am not anymore. ooh but i had the most awesome dream last night (: and the other time i dreamt that i was opening easter eggs and my had this pretty embelished butterfly shaped purse in it. i want it.
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| who wants to be a social entreprenuer |
[01 Jun 2008|01:55am] |
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tiffany thinks thirteen is way above cool
well okay it was awesome, those five days were awesome. its surreal isnt it? 23 total strangers coming together living in the same hostel. eating at the same table, those nightly chats, daily laughs, listening to the ideas the government tries to infuse in us, having those discussions after every presentation, panel discussion, movie screening and dialouge sessions. i mean we built an almost lifesize sand castle together. all at the same time while getting reminded that we are the smartest students and the future leaders of singapore. it just seems so queer that we knew each other from the seminar through the minibits of information we share with each other but yet at the same time we may all have this seemingly unknown and unrelated life that we keep private. as zhao duan so correctly and aptly puts it:
the future lies before you. like paths of oure white snow. be carfeul how you tread it, every step will show:
i could be an ex convict and live in a madhouse for all you lot may know
yes now we all see strangers in a different light dont we.i think we are all so different, queer, wacky and geeky each in our ways but geek is the new cool man, i must so put up the video of bryan and zhao duan playing the thumb-y pepsi cola one-two-three game and tag it 'future leadrers of singapore'. yess thats whats we do in our free timeee.
oh and to charmaine (sarah) and louisa (anna): the scandals are unforgettable. yes you can toally borrow my room. i hope lou doesnt see this (:
pre-u sem 2008
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| blogging block |
[27 Apr 2008|07:53pm] |
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i havn't blog in quite some time already because there is something wrong witht the modem and i hvn't been able to lift my lazy finger to call the singtel servicer, well in any case i am living and contented without the internet plus i get to sleep more. haha. but its pretty bummy cos i have had moments when i feel choked with emotions and want to blog but can't and now although the feelings are still here i can no longer translate them into words.
i am at andrea's house now with my notebook which is why i have internet. it has been an alright studying session? not too fruitful for me because i feel a little tired to think. well i am supposed to be studying for my physics test on tuesday because tomorrow i have pre-u sem filming until what i predict to be quite late. so i apparently got to finish studying tonight which i doubt i can but filming is super duper important beause we will have to present it during our first rehearsal at kj this wednesday already. and i can't film on tuesday because i have training/friendly with yj. floorball is yj's niche cca by the way. no i am not nervous, i am just making a pass comment. yes of course i am nervous about getting horrifiedly trashed.
i am falling asleep while typing this. wake up cheryl wake up. i love you cheryl.
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| my hairrrr! |
[16 Apr 2008|10:21am] |
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i was sitting on the bus too sch today when this cj boy who was trying to get off the bus hit my hair/head with enormous bag he was carrying and he didnt even apologise cos he was more concern about getting off the bus. well anyways i was a little mad so i yelled "you are such an idiot" okay yes i shldn't have. but then his friend apologise on his behalf =/
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| schoolies |
[14 Apr 2008|11:09pm] |
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thats just the four of us
remember how much i hated my school last year? hated it because the culture was weird and different, hated it because everyoneee there are so cheena, they like all the chinese and asian stuff that i am unable to immerse myself in, hated the long school hours, the long busrides, floorball and the difficult tutorials. well today is one of the days when i feel like i have had my fair share of fun in nanyang, i was just at the atrium with my friends doing napfa training, talking and laughing about things and i realise i have finally learnt to treasure the times i have spent with my jc friends, this is especially from the time after promos last year (from the start of the barbeque). and i cannot imagine what graduating from jc would be like if i think back and i didn't share these memories with you guys. we may not be uber close but i have accpeted you guys for who your are and well it is such a pleasure and even more so when we laugh over our fantastic a level results.
smth really uncanny happened today and i simply have to blog about it. so, i went to junction eight to eat with my friends after floorball today. upon arriving, we walked to long john's silver, pass macdonalds when i saw this group of rj boys sitting there and the thing is i tend to notice rj people cos i know quite many people form there? oh well anyways i looked straight at dilllon but i didn't even register him as him (prolly cos i wasn't expecting to see him and i hvn't actually met him before) but when i turned around, i saw bryden and the first thought that came to my mind was, "isn't that that irritaing pig?" well turns out he is cos he waved to me. he gives me the impression tnat he is really shy, unlike the boy i know via msn and text. its quite funny. well anyways bryden messaged after i walked away to tell me that dillon waa there too. and yes, although i was supposed to meet him only at the chorale concert, but how can i pass up on the opportunity to meet elaine's dillon? hahaha.
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boodust's journal
